My wife is an immortal black snake.

Page 41

"So here's the question: what you need is a promise? A promise that will absolutely be kept, right?"

"It's not me, it's us."

"Can you represent the other spy ponies of Kazimierz?"

“We’re not fucking ponies! And I can’t speak for them, but they’ll definitely follow suit once they know I’m getting triple the money.” Theresa pouted. Despite her youthful, vibrant beauty, her spitting on the ground—a crude gesture no different from a common soldier's—completely shattered her charm. “So, you’re offering triple, right? But how are we supposed to believe you can pay that much? Even if you’re a traitor, we need to see the money before we stab our original master in the back, right?”

"Actually, I've been wanting to say this all along: you're now under the control of the soldiers of the Duke of Kosiché. If you want to negotiate, isn't your attitude—"

"...terribly sorry!"

...

Do you spies in Kazimir have any integrity left?

Seeing Theresa, who immediately abandoned her dignity and apologized to him after realizing something was wrong, Yang Hao felt it was outrageous: If this spy is like this, isn't Kazimierz a piece of Ursus's plate? If they just push it in, it will probably be flattened and not even a city will be left, right? If nothing unexpected happens.

Casimir Fera was in despair. Alas, it was just a pity for that centaur that existed only in the picture book—but never mind.

How could he make a promise? Just as Yang Hao was racking his brains, Monica, who had received the call, arrived.

After entering the room, she quickly checked Yang Hao's condition and confirmed that he was indeed fine. However, for some reason, he took off his shirt. She then breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Lord Koschche is waiting for you to return. If you don't have anything to take care of, it would be better to go back as soon as possible."

"...As for this spy, he can be sent to prison first—"

“No, not yet. I need to finish my discussion before going back.” Yang Hao waved his hand, declining Monica’s offer. He needed to settle some of the secrets concerning the minor nobles in his territory with Miss Theresa before he could return home with peace of mind, so… he would have to stay here for a while longer. “Monica—let me ask you this first, as Koschei’s husband, I can issue a Koschei ducal citizenship certificate to anyone at any time, right?”

His inquiry seemed more like an attempt to give Miss Theresa a better understanding of the situation. Firstly, he was indeed Koschei's husband, and secondly—he was not a powerless figurehead. The Duchy of Koschei was now a territory he and his wife jointly managed.

Monica understood Yang Hao's meaning. She gave the Kuranta girl, whose skin was now covered in goosebumps, a meaningful look, then scanned her clean clothes to make sure that Lord Yang Hao wasn't *doing* anything there. After confirming, she answered truthfully:

"Yes. As Lord Kosiché's husband, you do have the authority to issue citizenship certificates or grant honorary citizenship to a foreigner. But it would be best to discuss this with Lord Kosiché before doing so."

"Row."

Yang Hao turned his head towards Miss Theresa. His smile remained the same, but for some reason, Theresa was now terrified of that seemingly ordinary smile.

“So, Miss Theresa, I think we can settle a small matter before we settle that big event. How about this—you unlock the things on your communicator first.” Yang Hao shook the Kazimir communicator in his hand. “Then, I’ll give you some cash. Then, I’ll have our soldiers treat you like citizens. You’ll enjoy all the rights of Ursus citizens in your resettlement area, even the rare provision of regular food in this economic downturn—except for not being allowed to leave your home, you can do what’s legal under our supervision.”

"...Huh? If I unlock that thing, you can take our lives whenever you want, right? This all-knowing Duke?" Theresa scoffed. The last remaining paper intelligence book was indeed their lifeline—but only if these Ursus people needed all the contents of that book.

If they only need the content on the communicator, wouldn't it be suicidal for me to foolishly unlock the verification program on the communicator?

So Theresa knew exactly what she had to stand for. She wouldn't unlock the verification program on the communicator, no matter what—

"Are you sure? If you don't unlock it, we can actually wait a long time, right?" The duke scratched his head, his smile inexplicably turning strange. "While I personally dislike imprisonment and punishments—that doesn't mean I can't execute you! Frankly, with so many profit-driven people in Kazimir, I could easily hire someone from Kazimir to unlock it. It's just a bit more troublesome, but we didn't plan to figure out what's hidden inside in just a few days."

Looking at it this way, you're not exactly necessities.

Hear this.

A few drops of sweat dripped down Theresa's face. She swallowed hard, and a hint of hesitation flashed in her eyes.

Seeing this, Yang Hao decided to add a few more ingredients.

"But killing them is meaningless to our duchy. After all, they are valuable laborers, and spies at that. People who are completely unprotected by any treaties are good experimental subjects."

"Well..."

She was sweating more on her face.

"And coincidentally, there's a territory next to our Kosiché Duchy called the Nikolai Duchy. Their Duke Nikolai is a real pervert—his recent hobby is to cast healing Originium Arts on himself while cutting off pieces of his own flesh to eat. Sigh, I wonder if Duke Nikolai would like Kuranta flesh? And if we send you there, we can strike hard while he's eating people, record the evidence, execute him on the spot, and gain another duchy. That's a huge profit."

"..." A look of panic appeared on her face. She didn't seem afraid of death, but rather afraid that her corpse would be "defiled"? Hmm... In other words, she didn't mind being labeled a traitor, but still cared about her reputation in other ways?

Yang Hao's eyes darted around. Under the deadpan gaze of Monica, the maid, and Paul's timely shift of attention, he snapped his fingers and chuckled:

"Don't worry—we'll write down the victims' names and publish them in newspapers around the world. 'Another victim of Duke Ursus Nikolai's cannibalistic tendencies, Miss Theresa, a former knight-errant from Kazimir and now a Kazimir spy, was today...'"

Do you like this news, Miss Theresa?

Yang Hao jumped off the edge of the bed, pacing back and forth while flashing Miss Teresa an incredibly bright and sunny smile.

"You will become the first Qazimir to be eaten in the history of Ursus, the first Qazimir spy to be eaten. You will also become the first Qazimir to be publicly recorded as being eaten by the Ursus people, which is a good thing."

"Gu..."

The thought that he would soon be recorded in the history books of various countries around the world as a "cannibal" seemed to shatter the little pony's will.

Sweating profusely, she trembled all over. She gritted her teeth, torn between the secret she had to keep for the sake of survival and wealth, and the shame of not being able to rest in peace even in death, her corpse to be desecrated.

"Kill...me...If you're going to do that, you might as well just kill me..."

Finally, Miss Theresa gritted her teeth and forced out these words. Seeing that her resolve was similar, Yang Hao decided to stop while he was ahead:

“Three times the amount of red gold, but before that you have to disable all the verification procedures on this communicator. I guarantee you and your sisters will have a peaceful life in Duke Kosiché’s territory, but if you don’t do that… we can implant cameras and listening devices in your bodies at any time and then send you to Duke Nikolai’s mansion.”

"...I'll deactivate it, I'll deactivate it right now! Don't send Mars and the others over there..."

The plan to send Teresa's sisters along became the final straw. Filled with grief and despair, she gave her answer, then obediently stepped forward and, with a humiliated expression, deactivated all verification procedures on the communicator.

Chapter Ninety-Seven

...

After Miss Teresa deactivated all security checks on the communicator, Yang Hao's provocative operation came to an end.

He first ordered everyone to place these Qazimir spies in a safer location for surveillance, and to treat them like ordinary Ursus citizens, allowing them freedom of movement except for not allowing them to go out or break the law, and providing them with ordinary food supplies. Then he left first.

After Teresa deactivated the verification process and witnessed Yang Hao give the order, she breathed a slight sigh of relief. At least they were safe for the time being, which was the best outcome. As for the remaining three times the price, they could deal with that later.

...She was personally escorted out by Snake Scales. After being put into a transport vehicle and staring at each other for a while with Mars and the little guy in charge of equipment maintenance, they both chuckled awkwardly, feeling the swaying of the vehicle as it moved.

"What happened over there? I saw the old lady get knocked out with a single punch... Ouch, that looks really painful..."

"I was initially thinking of resisting, and then those fully armed Ursus soldiers just stormed in." Mars said with a wry smile, her bitterness deepening as she looked at Theresa's revealing outfit. "Then the little one said that while she and the others were maintaining their weapons, someone downstairs suddenly shouted that their house was being targeted by naval guns... and then they surrendered. Right, little one?"

The short Kuranta girl, nicknamed "Little Dwarf," raised an eyebrow, but could only manage a bitter smile that looked more like a grimace: "What can we do? The knightly equipment we brought in is designed for infiltration! We don't even have a single longsword, let alone a shield. How are we supposed to fight off those dozens of elite Ursus soldiers downstairs?"

"So where do you see that naval gun?"

"I saw it from the window, but the problem is there weren't just one, there were three. The Ursus people are really outrageous; they actually dared to use naval cannons on residential areas, and they actually fired one..."

"After firing that shot, the surrounding citizens didn't make a sound, Lily?"

"How would I know?! Anyway, it's eerily quiet around here, and I'm not an Ursus, so how would I know what those Ursus people are thinking?!"

Seeing her two friends chatting happily back and forth, Theresa's smile became even worse.

She remained silent for a long while, and only after her sisters had finished speaking and looked at her did she finally let out a long sigh.

"Mas, Lily, we're in big trouble." Teresa began with this sentence, and in the next ten minutes or so of the "moving journey," she recounted to her best friend what she had encountered in that room, the man's true identity, and how she had disabled the communicator's verification program without permission.

"In short, our only insurance now is the paper intelligence booklet—we don't know if they'll even want it—and our abilities," she concluded bitterly. "Given the choice between being sent to some cannibal's table and just trying to survive, the latter is definitely more appealing..."

“Of course,” Mars nodded calmly. “If I were there, I would definitely make the same choice—betraying Kazimir isn’t such a bad thing now, and what’s the point of staying in a country that’s gradually being corrupted by capitalism?”

"Hiss... When the time comes, the conquering knights will probably be the first to twist our heads off."

"We'll see when the time comes. For now, let's live as long as we can—and are you sure that if a real war breaks out, Kazimir won't become a province of Ursus? It's no secret that those capitalists are embezzling military funds from the war knights and deliberately using experimental equipment that hasn't seen any real combat with them, including us. If it really comes down to punishment, those capitalists should die a much worse death than us, right?"

"But the problem is, those capitalists pay more in taxes every day than our entire team's total annual salary plus bonuses! The knights need their rewards to fund the war effort, and even if they skimp on some, the rest is still a huge sum... I bet five gold coins that those capitalists will be fine, but we'll be in deep trouble when we get back..."

“Go back? Go back for what? Our outpost was wiped out, we missed the scheduled communication time, the capitalists probably just consider us dead, right? What's the point of going back?” Lily rolled her eyes and interjected. “Instead of thinking about going back, we should be thinking about how to live here... Ugh, the economy here is so bad, will we still be able to afford smoked ham and butter? I mean real butter, not margarine.”

"...Who knows?"

Birds of a feather flock together; it seems my good friends are just as carefree as I am.

Theresa didn't know whether she was saddened by Kazimierz's downfall or happy that her sisters had survived the ordeal... Just as she was agonizing over this, she felt the car stop.

"Get out of the car," Snake Scales shouted from outside. "This is your new home—food will be delivered here every day, and you are not allowed to leave the house until you receive orders."

"...Let's go."

The three down-on-their-luck female spies exchanged glances, then got out of the car with a sorrowful expression.

After getting off the bus, they immediately rejoined the other women. Seeing that everyone was still wearing the revealing clothes they'd worn while conducting espionage, Theresa's lips twitched. She wondered if they were going to be wearing these clothes from now on.

"Also, the master asked me to tell you—you are allowed to apply for changes of clothes, but at most civilian clothes. Considering your value," the snake-scaled escort added, then pointed to the apartment building in front of them: "Now all of you, get inside."

Well, he's still a good man. I just hope the issue of the triple price can be resolved as soon as possible.

"...Yes, yes, Brother Bing..."

And so, whether voluntarily or involuntarily, the spies that Kazimir had sent to the Kosichean Duchy checked into the Lubyanka Grand Hotel, about half an hour's drive from the Kosichean Duchy's residence, which was heavily guarded by Ursus soldiers and Serpentscale.

...This hotel was originally a building left behind after a nobleman went bankrupt. With the idea that "it's better to make use of what's there than leave it unattended," Yang Hao changed the original destination of the captured spies on his way back to this hotel. He also had the local Ursus soldiers strengthen surveillance of the hotel and changed its official name from "Four Seasons Hotel" to "Lybianka Grand Hotel."

He originally intended to name it the Lubyanka Four Seasons Hotel, but then he thought that the Gulag Four Seasons Hotel, which was to be built next and was specifically for the prospective prisoners on the Naughty List, already used that name. In order to avoid confusion, it would be more appropriate to just call the current bankrupt hotel the Grand Hotel.

"Yes, so this Lubyanka Hotel will become the center of our spies' activities from now on—if all goes well, the headquarters of the Gauls after we've incorporated them will probably be here as well."

"Sir, wouldn't this seem..."

"Unsafe? No, no, no, it's very safe—I will give the Gauls the right to monitor the Casimirs, and the Casimirs the right to monitor the Gauls. So what if they form their own faction? They can just play office politics. In the end, both factions will have to depend on us to live a good life, so let's do it this way."

Yang Hao didn't tell Monica that his "Puppet Stage" could directly resolve the "conflict" between the two factions and their "dissatisfaction" with the higher-ups. After all, it was complicated to explain, and if Monica had a lot of time on her hands and was interested in the principle, he wasn't unwilling to answer her questions.

Moreover, more important than resolving Monica's confusion right now is dealing with the intelligence on his communicator...

[Event: The Spy in Casimir END]

You ended the spy crisis in the Duchy of Kosiché through utterly despicable intimidation, the lure of money, and promises to the knight lady. Now, the Casimirians have no spies left among you—of course, they'll soon send out the next batch. Perhaps those spies will be more loyal, and it will cost more to bribe them, but that doesn't matter.

You have obtained the communicator they previously used to record intelligence and had Knight Theresa disable all the security checks on it. By reviewing the intelligence, you discover that your duchy still has so many despicable people—some are taking advantage of the economic crisis to plunder the people's wealth, some are smuggling certain (narcotic drugs) while the duchy's soldiers and police are busy maintaining order, and some are even trafficking people to other duchies.

These nobles all share a common characteristic: they amass immense wealth, and the gold they hoard could allow you to build several Four Seasons Gulag hotels.

Besides, you're too embarrassed to ask your wife for money, and you happen to be short of money to bribe and hire those Kazimierz spies... How about you do it?

'New list, new list!'

"Um..."

Based on the information the incident provided, how many nobles in the duchy are now on the list of troublemakers?

Yang Hao frowned and thought for a moment. The duchy currently has about 40 minor nobles, and if you count them... well... about 30 of them need to be put on the list of troublemakers and dealt with properly.

In fact, Yang Hao hadn't expected so many nobles to cause trouble during the economic crisis, and what they were doing was something so serious that it required annihilation—even the seemingly least serious crime of "plundering the people's wealth" was still deserving of death considering that hundreds of families had been harmed.

As for smuggling [narcotic drugs]? Hmm... those hallucinogenic substances? Yang Hao could understand their military and medical uses. After all, some soldiers severely wounded on the battlefield might be able to use those drugs to survive until medical treatment arrived, and some patients in hospitals could also rely on those drugs to get through difficult times... But that doesn't mean you can use them elsewhere, to turn people into inhuman, ghostly drug addicts, right?

Therefore, the nobles guilty of this crime deserve to die, all of them deserve to die! Not only should their property be confiscated, but their smuggling channels should also be investigated. If they are not careful, they might be able to find a good way to expand their pharmaceutical warehouse storage by following the trail.

The last one, human traffickers? Does that even need explaining? Whether in his hometown or in this world, Yang Hao despises human traffickers the most. Literally. These human traffickers deserve to die. If his Four Seasons Gulag Hotel could be built sooner, Yang Hao would definitely lock them all up, give them a full round of hotel services, and then throw them into a field to bury them alive as fertilizer.

"Hmm...the names of the nobles listed here...I think Mr. Luther was among them? Oh dear? Why is there this kind of information here?"

Just as Yang Hao was feeling indignant about the secret of the minor nobles, he suddenly noticed that several nobles had another thing in common... Upon closer inspection, it seemed that they were targeting a lower-ranking noble named "Anton"?

What's going on here? Curious, Yang Hao carefully studied the information above and came to a conclusion:

That is, Mr. Anton, a rare kind-hearted person among the nobility, had his maid distribute bread to the unemployed residents outside, which blocked the path to wealth for some mischievous rascals. Blocking someone's path to wealth is like killing their parents, so these rascals joined forces and planned to eliminate Mr. Anton and his entire family on the night of March 12th.

Hmm... This Mr. Anton isn't in the newspaper? Looks like a gentleman who isn't even interested in prostitution.

So the day for the Gauls to be tested is midnight on March 11th, right? Yang Hao had an idea. He would use a "real combat test" to see the Gauls' actual combat strength, and at the same time, he would catch a few naughty kids and deal with them first.

"Monica—help me write down the new list."

"Yes. The list of naughty kids, right?"

"Yes, that's it. By the way, I need to talk to Koschei about today when I get back... Um, do you have any good ideas? I mean, I remember Koschei mentioning something before—"

"Please rest assured, the maids will not disturb you." Monica smiled, her head bowed. "As for what happens next? That's between you and Lord Koschche. Please... be strong."

"..."

His face was a little pale.

He seemed to understand why it's said that one should start a family before building a career... Given Koschke's current needs, he'd rather live in the office every day than go home every day...

He had to think of a way... no, he had to talk to her face to face. At this moment, Yang Hao's face was full of bitterness.

Chapter 98 (Bonus Chapter 2.7)

......

That night.

"Kosiché—simply put, this is what happened in my past, and what I got."

Inside the Duke's bedroom, the couple sat on the bed, seemingly discussing serious matters, but upon closer inspection, they appeared to be flirting.

Koschitch, now in the body of a kitten, sat on Yang Hao's lap, examining the intelligence backed up from the communicator on the phone Yang Hao had given her. She nuzzled Yang Hao's face with her tail as a reward. Perhaps because they had just showered together, they were both wearing loose bathrobes, and because of this, Koschitch's occasional shifting of her hips on Yang Hao's lap provided him with a unique kind of stimulation.

However, they are still discussing serious matters, so Kosic's actions will stop here for now.