Conan: I'm just an ordinary novelist

Chapter 194 A Glimpse of a Friend

[“Speak clearly! Speak!”]

Someone reached out and grabbed his collar, questioning with unwilling eyes:

【“Whose substitute am I!”】

[“Am I one of the people you have to make friends with in order to revive those people?!”]

【“Who gave you the task?”】

[“…Your friends must be very good, right? They are worth your death again and again.”]

[“When you were with me, was there ever a moment when your kindness came from the heart?”]

The man with red eyes was trembling slightly, and his white fingertips were tightly clasping the clothes on his chest.

He was at a loss as to what to do and in a trance, he saw countless friends whom he had only met once in his life.

They used similar words and murmured self-deprecatingly:

[“You do this on purpose, don’t you?”]

[“It’s just… your heart can no longer accommodate anyone else.”]

·

Zhu Fu Jingguang felt a severe tightness in his chest.

After opening his eyes, he sat up with great effort, and took a deep breath to dispel the loneliness and sadness that was blocking his heart.

When looking at those questions from a first-hand perspective, there is an illusion that there is no way to defend oneself.

After being questioned for a long time, he even had the illusion that 'Have I always treated them as substitutes?'

Not necessarily.

Father, like son.

Zhu Fu Jingguang rubbed his swollen eyebrows and tilted his head to glance at the electronic clock next to him.

7 o'clock in the morning is a very healthy time.

When his fingertips touched the crooked fever-reducing patch on his forehead, Zhu Fu Jingguang was stunned for a moment.

“…Oh, that’s right.”

He remembered that it seemed that Yun Xianhe brought him here last night!

"Idle Crane!"

"Good morning, Mr. Hikaru."

Zhu Fu Jingguang, who ran out of the house, stopped in a hurry when he saw Yun Xianhe sitting on the outer porch basking in the sun.

We hadn't seen each other for less than two weeks, and at this moment I didn't know how to start the conversation.

"Breakfast is on the table. Mr. Guang is sick so it would be better for him to eat something light."

"Okay... Xianhe, did you buy it?"

The person being asked looked back at him, raised his eyebrows slightly, and smiled teasingly:

"Mr. Guang, you don't want to eat what I cook, do you? You'll end up in the hospital."

“Ah, hahahaha, that’s true. …That’s true.”

Zhu Fu Jingguang sat down on the chair in a daze.

He stared at Yun Xianhe, who was sitting there in his clothes, for a while. After making sure that he was not dreaming, he finally let go of the heart that had been hanging in the air for many days.

At least the person was found.

"Idle Crane,"

"Mr. Guang."

Sitting on the outer porch, Yun Xianhe looked at the moonlight roses in full bloom on the wall, his thoughts following the dancing butterflies in the air, dispersing into distant old dreams.

The impact of "As if in a dream" on him was far greater than what he saw.

At least after facing similar rhetoric one after another, he could no longer maintain his previous calm.

The brave man's voice was very soft:

"My unreasonable behavior has caused you a lot of trouble these days, right?"

"……No,"

"Sorry, I was just scared for a moment. Haha... it's quite funny, being scared because of similar words."

Yun Xianhe did not wait for Zhu Fu Jingguang to speak.

He smiled as if in distress, his expression neither looked lonely nor as lively as before.

Just saying it plainly:

"Ever since my friends passed away, their shadows appear on everyone I see."

"The term 'substitute' is a bit too much, but being friends with you is not pure either."

"When I realized you really wanted to be that close friend of mine, I ran away."

"Because I feel that my attitude towards you is not equal. It's not as pure as you imagined."

"Feel sorry."

Yun Xianhe looked up and turned around to smile at Zhu Fu Jingguang who was sitting there, his slightly tired eyes full of entanglement and struggle.

The latter looked at the person whose face was mostly covered by slightly long hair.

I thought of the continuous 'nightmares' I had these days, and the criticism and disgust that the other person expressed towards me in the dreams.

The thin boy looked like a snowman that had been piled up and thrown in a corner.

It could melt and die at any time in the morning sun, somewhere unknown to others.

Zhu Fujingguang heard the other party's calm narration:

"Sorry, I said at the beginning that I wanted to become partners with Mr. Guang or something."

"I tried, but now that I remember everything, I can no longer make friends with anyone wholeheartedly."

"Superficial communication seems a bit perfunctory. Haha..."

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

The white fingertips were firmly gripping the wooden floor beneath him where the other person couldn't see.

It seems that this can help suppress the temper that may get out of control at any time.

The hero had a proper smile on his face, exactly the same as the one Zhu Fu Jingguang had seen countless times in his dreams.

The other party tilted his head and smiled as if in annoyance, then sighed:

"Oops...I seem to only be able to say sorry."

"If Mr. Guang feels angry, I can compensate you."

"As long as it is within my ability, I can give Mr. Guang whatever he wants."

As if thinking of something, the hero paused for a moment:

"You can kill me if you want. But you have to wait until I help Conan recover."

“…What are you talking about?”

Zhu Fujingguang's voice was filled with a hint of disbelief.

When asked, Yun Xianhe tilted his head and smiled softly:

"It's just a suggestion."

Seeing Zhu Fu Jingguang who did not reply immediately, Yun Xianhe turned around as if he understood something and looked at the sky in the distance.

He was giving the other party time to think and waiting for the other party's final verdict.

Just like it has happened countless times before.

Zhu Fu Jingguang stood up and walked to the outer corridor and sat next to Yun Xianhe.

When you feel the same way, the sky you see is clear and profound.

It seems that one can see more distant planets through them.

"Those people...are the irreplaceable ones in Xianhe's heart."

"Ah."

"They must be very nice people."

Hearing this, Yun Xianhe chuckled, with a hint of warmth in his eyes.

"very good."

Just because it's so good.

So he can do anything for them and give up any feelings offered by others.

If you become too obsessed with the mission world and integrate your body and mind into the entire world, you will be assimilated.

You will then be trapped in the timeline of this world, repeating over and over again, with no way out.

And once you get lost in the sea of ​​stars, you can never go home again.

"Are you going to go find them?"

"Wait until I help others realize their wishes. However, I should have taken back the pot of "Yachilina" in the first place."

After hearing this, Zhu Fujingguang paused, then laughed:

"It's just a dream. I won't take it too seriously."

A visitor from another world... He would rather believe that the other person is from their world.

In that case...even if we are separated, we can still look forward to meeting again someday.

After all, the distance between the world is too far.

"Would you like to become our friend for a short period of time?"

"...Mr. Guang doesn't care."

"not give a damn about."

The young man's large palm gently rubbed the boy's soft white hair.

Yun Xianhe lowered his head and didn't look at the other person, as if he was thinking about the possibilities.

"I also think you look a lot like someone I know."

"Ok?"

"But everyone is a different individual, and no matter how similar they are, they are not that person."

“I know, that’s why I feel…”

Only then will you feel indebted and guilty, and only then will you feel that you are unworthy of care when you wake up.

"You are really good to us on weekdays."

"I,"

"We all have our own purposes, but yours is purer than ours, and the injuries you suffered for us are real."

Zhu Fujingguang recounted every detail of his acquaintance with the other party, and finally said half-jokingly:

"Xianhe, just think of me as meddling in other people's business. I can't bear to see a good child alone."

"Why do you make me sound like a lonely old man?"

"Hahaha, it's a lonely young man."

Yun Xianhe looked helplessly at the person who laughed out loud, trying to find a hint of falsehood, or even anger in the other person's expression.

Seeing him looking at him, Zhu Fu Jingguang also looked back.

The wind rustled the leaves.

It seems that someone once said to him:

[“According to what you said, my mission has been completed, so my life or death has nothing to do with you, right?”]

【“Then why are you still so nice to me?”】

The person being asked remained silent, as if he didn't know how to explain.

The person opposite looked at him and smiled helplessly:

[“Admit it, you’ve already considered me a friend.”]

[“I just felt that you were not so casual when you were with me, and that you treated me differently from those people, so you subconsciously denied your good intentions.”]

The young man ignored the hero's stiff body and hugged him tightly in his arms, sighing:

[“You are such a stubborn person.”]

[“What if I boldly admit that I made new friends?”]

[“Even if you want to leave, you can still have this temporary happiness.”]

[“Hasn’t there ever been someone you only glimpsed once in your life?”]

So Yun Xianhe thought of the past again.

The adventurer with flaming red hair proudly raised the stone hanging on his chest to him:

[“I made the stone you gave me into a team emblem!”]

[“So? My cooking skills are pretty good, right?”]

[“When others ask me about it, I will say that this is the stone that the brave man gave me when I was a child. It is a testimony to our friendship!”]

Time passes.

【“Idle Crane.”】

The brave man blinked when he heard the voice, and in front of him was Yu Dengnian, who was no longer young.

The other person's fiery red hair turned gray and wrinkles appeared on his cheeks.

Years of running and fighting have caused his body to deteriorate greatly in his later years, but his smile is still bright:

[“Don’t cry when the time comes, or I’ll have to jump out of my coffin to comfort you.”]

【“Haha… Just kidding.”】

He won't cry.

[“That’s great! The heroes actually came to see me off. Ahem! They can just envy me! Hahaha!”]

The person lying on the bed still held the stone in his hand.

That was the starting point of his life and the glory of his life.

The hero heard the other party mutter in an inaudible voice:

[“The happiest thing in my life is meeting you.”]

[“In the next life…I will still be your friend.”]

The sixty years of other people's lives are only a fraction of the brave man's age.

The first friend I saw at a glance.

Yun Xianhe, who was sitting on the outer porch, squinted his eyes due to the dazzle of the sunlight and lowered his head in embarrassment.

Ah, yes.

In fact, what he feared most was the loss after being separated from the world.

"Mr. Guang."

"Ok?"

"Let's go to that ramen restaurant for lunch."

"it is good."

[“Even though life is short, enjoy the journey and the present moment!”]

[“What do you think? This is the most philosophical thing I have ever said! Hahaha!”]——Yu Dengnian